Eddie Takosori’s

UFO Attractor’s Handbook

Practical Advice for an Impractical Hobby

Table of Contents

A keen eye will note that the table of contents is far more extensive than the previous introduction might imply.   This is because the introduction was written before I started to rewrite this, the second edition of The UFO Attractor’s Handbook; while the table of contents was compiled as I did the rewrite, and as such accurately delineates the entire contents of the book.   A quality that is pretty darn handy for a table of contents to possess.

Part I - In the Beginning

A - Acknowledgments - Thank you Eddie Takosori, you are the wind beneath my wings.   (7-13-08)

B - Introduction - If you can make sense of this section, you really don’t need to read the rest of the book.   (7-14-08)

C - Testimonials and References - Not in my book you don’t.   (7-15-08)

D - Table of Contents - P.S. YOU ARE HERE.   (7-13-08 through

E - The Dark - A sneak peak ahead.   If you want to see UFO’s, this is what you need to do--honest and for true.   (7-28-08)

Part II - The Second Edition - In its entirety.

What can I say, I was capitalizing on the success of the first book, and slammed one of those short pamphlets out the door just as fast as I could.  

Part II - How to use this book

A - Introduction to the 1st Edition.   Cause you got to start somewhere.

Versus say how to read other books - like self help books for instance, not that this is one of those.   I don’t see how increasing your chances of meeting a Klk’it raiding party could be interpreted as helping, no matter how liberally you are willing to interpret the phrase.

One Day at a Time - Take is slow.   No need to rush.   Patience is its own reward.

With Pencil in Hand - Why the heck should I spend countless hours editing this stupid thing?   Just let me know where I went wrong and email me the corrections.

As a Notebook   - Nothing is written in stone.   Don’t like a chapter?   Rip it out and replace it with one of your own.   Besides I’m sure you’re funnier than I am.   (Got to work you own program.)

Part III - Definitions

UFO - By which we mean flying saucers piloted by little green men from other planets.  

Alien - Those little green guys who drive the UFOs.   Duh!   Didn’t we just get through covering this.

UFO Spoor - By which we mean, how can you tell if a UFO or aliens are around and about.   Classic signs like being frozen, blurry thoughts, electronics not working properly and stuff like that.

C is for CIDC - Don’t ask me what CIDC stands for, that’s just one of the many things I forgot, that and how I go about collection my pension.

An Interview with Eddie Takosori - Retired CIDC operative and wannabe author interview himself and give you the inside scoop.

Tit for Tat - Why the Klk’its shot the space shuttle out of the sky and other tales of relativistic fiction.       

Part IV - UFO Spotting for True Believers

or a UFO in every garage and an alien in every pot...
The Midnight Stroll Revisited?

Record Keeping & Goal Setting - the whys and wherefores, an introduction.

Journals - I’ll show you mine if you show me yours (My Journal As Example)

Data Logging - Now, no fair holding out.   Fair is fair.   If I show you mine, you’ve got to give it up and show me yours.   (My Data as Example).

Goal Setting 101 - Visualize your goal, figure out the steps required to make it a reality, and do them.   This isn’t rocket science.   (Mermaid Swim?)

Goal Setting 202 - It’s really just three more credit hours for the same coursework as 101.   Figure out where you are now, where you want to be, what it will take to bridge the gap, and then guess what?   Do it.

Goal Setting 303 - racking up that college credit by taking the same coursework over and over is SMART - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Timely.

Goal Setting 4000 - the graduate course.   I actually have no idea what this one will be.   I hope I think of something good.   Otherwise, I’ll have to give everyone in the class A’s for just showing up.   (Probably just a dumping ground.)

Eating Right - You want to taste good for those meat loving aliens don’t you.   I mean, they traveled all this way, the least you could do it be healthy.

Exercise - See above.

Drugs - They’re not just for breakfast any more, and not for lunch, nor dinner either.   Stay away.   Drugs--Bad.

Lights in the Sky - Or that time I saw a UFO on the way home from a bar.   Cool beans.   Oddly no one believed me.   Something about me being drunk.

The Importance of a Bad Night’s Rest - You think you’re really going to see a UFO?   Dream on.

Equipment - A red LED penlight, a pair of binoculars, pencil, paper, suitable clothing, and 15,000 copies of The UFO Attractor’s Handbook.   Hand them out as party favors for visiting alien dignitaries.

Road Trips -   Not to other planets, that would be Space Trips, this here section is on road trips.   Say, to a deserted desert highway, an airport, or Roswell, NM.   You’re really not a devotee until you make the trek to Mecca, and then there’s Area 57, not to mention the CIDC HQ building in where else but Washington, DC.

Space Trips - Hey, if you get the chance, go for it.   Don’t forget to drop me a line and let me know how it went.  

Ceaseless Research - I’m probably full of it... good, solid ideas, but then it doesn’t hurt to get a second opinion.   This is where you fill you mind with all things UFO-ish.

The Knowledge Trap - a.k.a. Ignorance is bliss.   If a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, what does this tell us about the average intellectual or scientist?

Part V - Advanced UFO Techniques

Think you’re good?   Then it’s time to get more better.

The Moral Imperative -

I Shall Not Kill - And not just because you’d go to jail.

I Shall Not Steal - Perhaps even worse than killing!!!

I shall Not Judge - Not now, not ever.

Dreams - do you realize that until very recently many scientists did not acknowledge the existence of dreams?

Dream Journal -

Importance of Waking Up -

Lucid Dreams - often billed as a place without consequences, but what you do here has a profound effect on your soul.

Meditation - An introduction.

Breath Out - Most folks get it wrong.   Before you can breathe in, you must first breath out.

Breathe In - So great, your mind is empty.   Now fill it up.

Yoga - Is standing in repose.   Try it for five minutes a day.   Don’t worry, the world isn’t going anywhere.

Social Health      

Support Groups - Career (job, professional), Family and Friends, Social Groups (school, church, associations),

Part VI - UFO Spotting for Skeptics

Believers and non-believers rejoice, I give you common ground.   (Note: All advice given in previous sections still holds for non-believers as well.)

The fine art of lying

CIDC interview part 2 - If you’re going to lie, get your story straight.

Dodo bird hunt

False Memories

Manufactured Memories

Guided Imagery - a.k.a. fake experiences.   How to go water skiing in your head, or drive a car in your sleep.

UFO sighting, on the way to work

How to host a hoax

Airports and Flight Paths - sounds like two case studies to me, of the time I saw Wonder Woman’s invisible plane (no mean feat that), and of living under a military flight path.

Imaginary Friends

Peak UFO experiences for everyone - I’ve got no idea what I mean by this.

Further research - weather effects, optical illusions. Sun auras and ball lighting -- if not strictly speaking UFOs -- are pretty darn cool in their own right.

Part VII - Bringing Reality to Its Knees

You’ve got it on the run, now make it beg for mercy.

The problem with Science - Scientific methodology.   What went wrong?  

The problem with Science Part 2 - The scatter plot diagram versus the bell curve.

The Mystical Experience - A History.

Forcing the Issue - How to make the universe return your calls by abusing your body and mind.   Also known as killing yourself slowly.   The don’t eat, don’t sleep portion of the book.

Peak UFO Experiences for Everyone - Maslow, the Triangle of the Illuminati, and how a rising tide floats all boats.   (I.e. If one reduces their needs, the Pyramids of Needs isn’t so tall after all.)   Perhaps this should be renamed as: Simplification - Less is more.

UFO sightings - Yellow porche and a raccoon that wasn’t there, maybe I should get some sleep

Emotional Control - The robot and the rose?   (Once again, I have no idea.) (Why?   So can stay in moment and attend.   Counting to ten.   Concentrating on breathing.   Watching the worries drift away.)

The Nature of Reality - Your belief rules the world.

Change Reality by Becoming a True Believer

Changing Yourself Changes Everything

A Creator’s Obligation to its Creation - Also known as a creation’s obligation to its creator (or a person’s relationship with themselves).

Freewill - Hey, don’t blame me.   This isn’t my mess.

The Heresy Problem - The fine line between lying, and being just a little too aggressive with your positive thinking.

Don’t Be the Limiting Factor Your Life - set up the possibilities and get out of the way.

Part VIII - Appendix - Being a poorly misunderstood organ, and an even more misunderstood section of a book.



Glossary - In which terms such as UFO Spoor, Klk’it, and CIDC are defined or explained in one or two short sentences.

Exercises - In which activities not covered elsewhere are mentioned including: dressing up like an alien, role playing, listing UFO/alien expectations, earliest memory of a desire to see a UFO, bust the rut (one thing stopping you now from seeing UFO), checklist of sights to see, best alien to encounter (versus worst), why the worst isn’t so bad and the best not so good, goal setting for next week (month, and year), 40 days (seclusion), expect failure (rejoice in smallest of successes), UFO time (research, visualize, await), UFO (Unload, Focus, Observe), triangle of perception (belief, abilities, action... increase and triangle increases, or just reset where triangle is focused)

CIDC post operative residue

Hitchhikers Guide

My experiences

Desert - check

Bar/ad lights - check

Space shuttle - check

UFO on the way to work - check

Wonder Woman, Arkansas Flight Path - check

Info on Aliens

Klk’its

Those sexy Sirens From Sextus-6&9

Celaphopods

Slime Aliens

Little Green Men (FLyod)

Listening (Why?   Why not?)

1st Edition Cuts - Section

Lines (protean bars, People Ect)

UFO Attractor Handbook 2nd Ed

Takosori Home


Eddie Takosori’s
UFO Attractor’s Handbook
Practical Advice for an Impractical Hobby
© 2008 Copyright Brett Paufler