The Diary Project


Make It Stop

This is a detail of an industrial flourescent light array, three tubes arranged vertically, with associated casing


This is the start of the Fourth Week in Lock-Down. That means, I've already done three. I think it's getting easier. Definitely, Social Media makes for a sort of crutch.

The Art Institute of Chicago is closed. I know not till when, but likely April 30th. All events (lectures, tours, performances, etc.) are cancelled until May 10th. And school tours are cancelled until May 29th. These are all 'at least to' dates.

The library is closed until April 30th.

Hey. We ran into a homeless guy last night on our walk downtown. He turned the corner and there we were, backing away from him to maintain that 6', which we'd prefer to keep at 25'. That is the second time... at almost the same place... with (most likely) the same guy. Anyhow, he quickly scurried past, muttering and swearing. I wonder if he understands (but probably doesn't care) why we recoiled.

Evening walk was nice and pleasant. Not very many people. We waltzed our way (sort of, kind of, not at all) behind a church and walked a labyrinth. And the one park, which we were pretty sure was closed, was.

The real fun came when another indicated they might wish to join our quarantine group... in our very small apartment... for two weeks. Gads that would be painful. Hopefully, it won't come to that. We'll see. I should maybe take it personally, on account of us being the mask-less shoppers, we are already the infected ones. But I do not. I don't feel that Covid will be The End of Me.

Pain Averted!

Of course, a great story and/or experience has also been averted.

Everyone For Themselves!

I am way tired... from working out. Though, I'm having some coughing issues.

Also, my mind is starting to go. But I am very tired, body weary.

Freedom of Movement

I started the day with a Dance Party, which would have been difficult to do (yes, it would have been) had another been sleeping on the couch... mere feet away.

A nice long phone conversation, keeping in touch.

On the evening walk there were only a few other pedestrians, but plenty of drivers picking up food outside the restaurants.

I've had a bit of a cough, which the walk in the cold did not help. But it's nothing to be concerned about.

As we head into sleep, I am a bit sad, morose, and/or tainted by a slight melancholia, the reason for which I cannot quite put my finger upon.

It was a good day. Not highly productive. But if one equates Social Media with a game, it was a very full and productive day for a game day.

There is no direct cause for my funk.

Back when I started working out, some days I'd be so tired I felt like crying. So, maybe that has something to do with it. But it doesn't feel like I nailed it, like I got the reason right. Usually, my mind let's me know when I'm right.

Last action before going to sleep is deleting Social Media.

Sun Day Is A Fun Day

We'll hit 10,000 Dead, today.

I would most definitely be perusing Social Media had I not deleted it. Hopefully, some sort of thought or more meaningful consumption will fill the hole.

After a few days, I had started to track various aspects of my Social Media usage... if not very well. So, I'll likely start on a write-up of that, today.

This Is Life

I obey the quarantine. But I no longer care. I question it's effectiveness. True. An effective treatment or viable cure is that much closer... as are satisfactory supplies of PPE: Personal Protective Equipment, don't you know. But still, I question what we are doing with this quarantine. And in that sentiment resides the answer to why it was implemented so slowly.

I've read all the way up to Report #14 from The Imperial College and am working on a few articles, which arose from a search for Covid Life Cycle PDF.

We took a nice long walk, beating the expected rain coming this way, this afternoon.

We cracked 10,000. 25,000 is still looking pretty distant.

I have few worries. I need to prepay my taxes. That's what's on my mind.

Though, there is that melancholia that I can't quite put my finger upon. Of course, one must balance that against literal weeks without my regular anger or day-to-day loneliness. So, who really knows? I'm probably sad over a life gone by. Also, I'm going blind. But none of that rings of truth... as the cause of the current hidden concern. It's not The Rona.

The Stock Market went up 1,600 points, today. If it rallies again, I should find a way to short it... or maybe, there is a cure.

Good News?

The Market is up: 10% on two days, over 23,000. And the Death Curve looks like it may have topped out. But this may be premature. I do not know how to take advantage of my continued belief that The Market will fall. Then again, perhaps 20,000 is the floor these days.

I just read that upwards of 100+/day in New York City alone may be dying at home alone. It would be my choice. This does mean the numbers are under reported.

Sink overflowed. Actually, the sink drained into the dishwasher and overflowed from there, spilling a nice black muck onto the floor. Two workers are in attendance. Quarantine has been broken in a major sort of way. And once drained, there will be a few hours of clean-up.

The Plumber's Snake has arrived. And some degree of disinfectant is being done for us. So, that is nice.

We have positive air pressure: fan and two ACs blowing in their direction. And both Filters are on high. So, doing a little to keep our place clean {of The Rona}. But they are in an enclosed space, which we consider our own (and use for food prep, no less), so Quarantine Broken.

Also, due to the nature of their job, I figure they are carriers. No offence. But ours is not the first foreign space they have invaded. These days, theirs is a high risk profession.

This is a more involved job than I would have guessed.

Despite The Market gains, I'm staying put, neither Shorting nor Going Long. I can get behind a major investment. But not at this level. Half the losses have been gained back. I am better off focusing on other things... writing, for instance.

A Professional Plumber {full time, as opposed to general maintenance} was called. So, another is in the apartment, but at least, wears a mask.

Hottest day of the year... so far.

The apartment smells and black gunk got all over. There will be plenty of washing of pots and pans around here for the next few days.

The window has been open all day, which is not usual. Fans and filters going full blast. Right now, it doesn't smell that bad... finally.

On account of breaking Quarantine, others want to reset the clock. So, we did it all, putting in groceries we really didn't need (along with dairy, that's not going to hurt) and splurged on pizza.

Finally, on account of the rags (being used to clean the muck), I hand washed maybe twenty in bleach. It really would be nice if this place had better air throughput.

The Market is flat on the day, so if I had bought a Put at the {intra-day} high, it would almost be in the money. Still, I am sitting it out.

Covid can establish itself in the gut. As such, we are (or at least, I am) using Kefir as a sort of Probiotic Preventative. I don't think Kefir cures or prevents Covid. But I do believe it is good for the gut, which is the intent.

If we got infected today, I would expect some kind of symptomatic response by Sunday.

Having heard a rumor that tickets will be issued to enforce Social Distancing, I am now officially against The Lock-Down. My patience has been exhausted.

A New Beginning

I am done with The Virus. I am done with Quarantine. I will do as others do, as per the law, reasonable guidance, and as my In Group desires. But I will not be pushing the envelope, going for zero contact.

Shortness of breath has a way of changing one's mind. But I am not currently short of breath.

It's amazing how much time nothing takes. Four hours after awakening and it feels like I've done nothing. This is not a new feeling.

Finances, a bit of Programming, and cleaning up the gunk from yesterday has consumed the morning. But I did not Proof Read anything, so that feeling of progress alludes me.

The Market is up again... or trying to go up. Yesterday, it was up nearly 750. But closed flat. The same thing could be happening, today. It's just as well I never got in The Market. I would have Shorted it; and therfore, lost money.

There is great friction over the clean-up. I hate physical labour. I really do. There was a reason I spent most of my life out of shape.

I believe (at best) Quarantine should have been enacted a week earlier. And having made the decision, it should have been 100%.


They didn't Quarantine on the Front Side. I no longer have any desire to do so on the Back Side.

An easy walk... loads of folks in the park.

The Market is up 800 on the day. What were people expecting that they think it is over? {In other words, if this is it and this is what folks were expecting, why did The Market Crash, in the first place?}

Is the dishwasher clean of gook? If so, where is that smell coming from?

Game Day

I'll likely start a computer game, today.

The Market is up again. I really did not call that. I would have lost money. In fact, it's up so much, one might wonder why it ever went down. Of course, I am conveniently forgetting The Stimulus Package. So, never mind.

I killed the afternoon and most of the evening getting nowhere in a Computer Game. Likely, more of the same, tomorrow.

Worst Easter ever.

Worst Summer, too. They are talking about cancelling everything.

I wonder what the Suicide Rates are like.

The Market was up again, today. It's closed for Good Friday, tomorrow.

A few light snow flurries... almost not even, little specks of cold.

I felt a bit sick, today. And I am dead tired.

I am sick of this Quarantine.

Hey, a new file, tomorrow. I probably should set that up now.

I'm slowly working on my taxes, getting the 1099's. I can do bits here and there. It will make sense to have it ready to go by the time Quarantine lifts.

They closed the Tennis Court and Jungle Gym in the Local Park. I'm really not behind this Quarantine, anymore. Do it. Or don't. But it seems so... ineffective.

This is an old image from 2009 or so, of a Sunset from the house I used to live in on The Big Island, clouds in the sky, passable sunset, blacked out trees in the foreground, and a nice circular sun flare or light flare from the lens, which really makes the picture, the shot might have been taken through a window, who knows

What If?

What If we (Little Girl) had bought that house and were spending our quarantine there?

It's an envious thought.

Next Diary Project Entry

Home Diary Project Index

© copyright 2020 Brett Paufler