Brett Rants

Meditation

Being Aware Of That Which Is Aware


This is a stylized eye, representative of awareness.  I can be aware of many things: sights, sounds, smell, touch, and taste.  Or I can go inward and look at myself, turn my awareness back on itself, and see that which I am.  Anyway, black on a white and alpha background, there is a starry eye with a star in a star in a star taking the place of the pupil

Breath Deep

Recently, I was advised that at The Heart, Zen was about being.

Hey, Be Here Now.

Or better yet (as long as I'm plugging books), Embrace The Smile That Is This Moment.

Whatever the case, Breathe.

That is to say, I am here. I am breathing. So, I might as well be here. And I might as well breathe. And as long as I am going to be here and breathe, I might as well do a good job of it, you know, attend.

Attend to Here.

Attend to Now.

Attend to Breath.

And that's about all there is to it. Well, the real kicker for me was when I was advised to Stand Up Straight. So, it's not so much about being here, breathing now, and all the rest, as being here in the right way, breathing correctly, and doing everything that I care to do in the same Honourable & Intentional Manner.

Personally, I've found simply Breathing Correctly to be quite exhausting, as by nature, I'm as sloppy about the process (and my entire life) as possible.

Anyhow, I would guess, that if I breath right:
And this in turn will mean:
I mean, maybe not.

But I like to think so.

Relax

Seriously, relax.

I mean, I should Relax. You can do what you want to do. This isn't advice. This is Self Help.

It's Guidance for me.

It's Guidance for myself.

And I should Relax.

There is no hurry.

I've come to believe that I Will Live Forever. For, I Am Immortal.

Fine.

Even I do not believe that... not fully... not entirely... not with complete and utter conviction.

But it's a Working Hypothesis. And I've made worse bets in my life... on my life... with my life.

Being Immortal, Living Forever, Having a Life after This One, For Ever and Ever, I need not be in a hurry.

I have All of Eternity.

So, I can Relax, Take It Easy, and even Close My Eyes For Awhile... or really, just Stop and Smell The Roses for as long as I desire.

I like doing nothing.

I like resting.

I like relaxing.

Seriously, Naps are about the best.

And for me, the difference between Napping and Meditating is one of Intent. Which am I Intending to do?

Be Aware

When I Nap, I try to Escape Reality, to Disappear, which is fine enough as it goes. But if I want to Be My Best, if I want to Breath My Best, then maybe I should, also, want to Nap My Best.

And I will call My Best Napping Meditation.

Look, as A Natural Function of Being a Human, I can Feel Things and Sense Things. I can See Through My Eyes.

There's nothing magic there, nothing mysterious.

I use My Eyes.

I See.

And even if I Close My Eyes, I Can Still Choose To See.

Here's a bit of a progression regarding what My Eyes tend to See when they are closed.
I have had trouble going to sleep for years. I'm not going to say that I've gotten any better at it. But I will say that I enjoy my time laying in bed a lot more these days, watching the visual progression.

If I am lucky, My Dreams are Lucid.

Beyond Dreams, I am told there are Neon Filled Worlds, which at some point become The Outer Lights.

I've never been there... not that I can remember.

Lucid Dreaming is my limit.

But there is a lot more for me to see behind my closed eyes than mere eyelids.

Be Aware Of Everything

I have Five Senses.

If I can follow Sight, I should be able to follow Hearing, Touch, Taste, and Smell, as well.

Though, I am led to believe Touch, Smell, & Taste are some Advanced Level Stuff.

Hearing is likely the next in line for me. I may well never get to the others.

Well, no.

Touch seems doable.

And if I can do Touch, why not Smell and Taste? They're pretty much the same, right?

But those are just the senses.

There are other things to which I can attend.

Meditation Is A Mind Looking At Itself

I've been able to track a few different categories of Mental Activity.
That's Five... or count The Individual Senses and it is however many.

But there is one level beyond.

Well, there's this rumour that there is this one level beyond.

Self Awareness

What is Meditation?

It is Being Aware Of That Which Is Aware.

I mean, I like Visions. I like Dreams. I like kicking back in my chair and just relaxing.

Is this Meditation?

Who knows?

Is it on The Path?

I like to think so.

And what is at the end of That Path, The Only Path, The Only Journey There Is?

There is The Self looking at The Self.

There is Awareness Being Aware of Itself.

This really is The Ultimate Goal of Meditation... for me, anyway.

Nirvana

It would be nice if At This Point, At This Center where The Self is looking at The Self, if I Found Myself Surrounded By Myself, Wrapped Up In Myself, A Thousand Million Lifetimes, The Whole Thread of Existence As One, Spread Out, In a Single Moment.

I mean, it would be nice, wouldn't it?

It sounds sort of cool.

It sounds revelatory.

And I am led to believe (that is to say, I have a sneaking suspicion) this can be found at The Curious Intersection Between Nothing & Everything.

This Is The Self.

This Is (whatever This Is) The Self Looking At Itself.

And I would say that is The Final Goal of Meditation.

But even if I'm wrong, even if it's a pipe-dream, to get there, I'll have to take a deep breath, stand up straight, and fly right.

And by doing All That, I'll yield so many Side Benefits, it hardly matters if The End Goal is a Reality or an Illusion.

For In The End, The Journey Is All That Matters.

For in the end, that's all there is.


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Right?
Wrong?

Does It Matter?

Like as not, in a few more years, I'll be Zeroed Out and/or Reset just like everyone else.

Does it matter how I enjoy myself in the meantime?


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