Brett Rants

Taking Out the Trash

The job no one else wants is the job that always needs doing.

Being a listing of Rants (and other projects) that I shall leave (and/or are better left) undone. So, a trash bin, as it were... or a brain dump, if that sounds better to you.

The Warm Loving Embrace of the Protective Directive

I like the title, though I can't remember the nuances attached to it... or even, what exactly it refers. I know it had something to do with falling into code, but whether the code itself or some large company was to be the Big Brother, father figure I never had, I can no longer remember. Still, catchy title though, huh?

The Command Line of My Soul
The Idea(l) of Thought

Chaos Bound, into The Heart of Darkness, I Robot and for no other, to Boldly Go Where No Man Has Gone Before... into that Realm where knowledge does not yet shine... and so on, and so forth. So, um, yeah, right. Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah. Right. The idea would be nestled between:
So, what's your totem language?
Your sect?
Your denomination?
If by these words I have not made the idea clear, I doubt it ever shall be: Code to Live and Live to Code, what else need be said? For into the bytestream, eventually, we all must go...

Kevin Stillwater Found Dead

I could blow the headline up... but as of yet, I've not found the will. Turns out, yet another, of my writing compatriots has bitten the dust. Acclaimed (or should that be 'a claimed') Dream Weaver Kevin Stillwater was found dead in his apartment all alone (no real surprise there) on October 16th, 2065. Friends and relatives of the deceased were unable to be located for further (or any, really) comment. Though, this writer will remark that 'The Ides of October be Ominous Times' for my 'friends'. Perhaps, someday, I will make a suitable website memorial to the man. But as he has fifty years yet, himself, to prepare for that eventuality, if he can't be bothered, I don't know why I should be...

Ninja Girlfriend

A story by that title (Ninja Girlfriend) might actually become a tale one of these days. Unlike the original yarn, which had something to do with a Crystal Warrior (an author and/or plot in need of rescuing and/or being moved forward, stuck in stasis as he is), Edmund the Eunuch Elephant (a kind hearted soul, just watch where he sits... or maybe he does that on purpose), Nicki the Dark Necromancer (more like a mummy, as cold as ice with a heart of stone, and all that), and her ever trustful Fey companion bringing up the rear (with a nice rear of her own, of course, just in case the name wasn't enough of a descriptor for you). I'm sure it would have been a delightful tale (what with Nicki's endless frustration over Edmnud's lack of interest, which is only fitting, if you ask me, in light of her total lack of interest towards the author's need... you know, or anything resembling plot development). But for whatever reason, I can't seem to be bothered to devote 500+ hours to the project (oh, hey, now 500+ unpaid hours, that might have something to do with it). But, whatever. Do as you will with the notion as you (or at leasst, I) envision a thousand year old (and thus, ever scantily wrapped mummy, a.k.a a sexy) Dark Necromancer riding atop a Flying Elephant looking for fun, adventure, and a way to postpone rescuing that pesky Crystal Warrior (yours truly, frozen in the sands of time) for as long as possible... if we get lucky, the fun and games might just last all the way through until the end of the third book. But, e-gads, 1,500+ hours. I think I'll just paint the picture in my mind, chuckle silently to myself at some half formed joke involving a sprightly young Fey, Edmund's butt cheeks, and the continual extraction of the former from the later, and finally moving on before the censors catch wind...

Sharks & Minnows

I've done a few Agent Based Computer Models. And for awhile I was thinking of modelling a swimming pool in full swing in the depths of summer stocked with a full array of semi-competing factions; or that is to say, a pool filled with swimmers who had varying interests in playing Sharks & Minnows, Tag, Marco Polo, and just splashing around by themselves or diving off the high board. The purpose being to see what patterns emerged. In an abstract sense, this sort of project is related to traffic, parking, and other problems relating to the optimum use of the commons, but, what shall we guess, the 100+ hours doesn't seem worth the effort... especially after considering that I already know that all the 'insights' to be derived will be hard coded from the start based on my assumptions, but I digress.

Stack Overflow

I feel that I'm overly negative, critical in these rants; and so, I wanted to express more gratitude. Thus, let me take a moment to thank Stack Overflow for all the assistance the site has provided.


You know how they say, don't go shopping if you're hungry? Well, I'm a bit of a cheapskate. But I'll tell you this. If I agree to pay for a nice dinner out, but then decide to eat at home, I just buy stuff like crazy. Compared to restaurant prices, full retail is dirt cheap.

Acronym Death

Between economics and programming, I read a fair number of technical journal articles; and many of them are near incomprehensible (Ic). See (C), they define (Td), words and phrases that make no sense (S), and so, you C, to make any S of the Ic of it all is nearly impossible. Yeah, so something like that only better, with the last sentence being some sort of acronym gobblegook: ACT v TCP or NET/P yields Ic. On that I think we can all agree.

Poor Company Policies

No, it's true. Many companies have remarkably bad polices as viewed from a Public Relations stand. I won't go out of my way to name any names, but suffice to say, I notice when a company annoys me, it's usually over something that benefits them very little, and one of the first things I do in response is evaluate whether I actually need, want, and/or desire to continue interacting with said company any more. So, yes, I might install your stupid update (or whatever). But keep in mind, prior to doing that, I most certainly contemplated deleting your stupid app (or severing our relationship) completely. Just saying.

Star Viewing Cafe

The ultimate solution to light polution, places you can go to at night (like a bar or whatnot) where the lights are turned low and the ceiling is lit up just like the night sky. I guess, the next thing my mind wants to do is turn it into a laser light show with exploding coments and all the rest. But the base idea is more tranquil than that: stars, nothing more... OK, maybe a little moonlight to keep the mood feeling just right as we drift off into the void...

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