Brett Rants

Nikolai

Because every good (fictional) character deserves a fresh start.


Nikolai is KGB, which, of course, means he's a retired Konglomerated Gypsum Board salesman. Beyond that, I don't really know the details... perhaps something about him relocating to the suburbs via the Witness Protection program or something like that.

As follows are some of his thoughts and musings.
One day, I walk to where the sidewalk ends and come to the lake. So, I take off clothes and swim across. But on the other side, the houses start up again. I never did reach the end of them. That is when I realized this Suburbia be just the other name for the endless stretch of Purgatory Hell.
They say there is Chromium Six in the water... or maybe it is the 'vitamin' pills Natasha keeps on giving me. Yes, it is true. Nikolai's piss may glow the neon green, now. But he has never felt the better. Chernobyl has nothing on me.
As to exercise,
it may hurt. But the real man, dies in pain.
Chump? Nikolai did not make him the chump. Yet, it was only after meeting Nikolai that he realized what he already was.
Finally, one for the ladies.
One does not change the world through attitude; but rather, through force of will.

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Yeah, I knew there was a reason I stopped working on this project. Or, you know, this is about when I decided to write my latest novel: Oh, Nikolai!

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