FILE: Minataur Tails - Translator's Bio - Brett
DATE: 2013
ARCHIVE: 2020-08-28
(c) Copyright Brett Paufler

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Two abandoned Translator's Bios, neither of which I can ever see using.

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#Long Version of Bio

Brett Paufler (the copyright© holder for the Dragon Bound series in the Earthen Realms as apposed to Celli the Happy Go Lucky Celaphopod who is the author) grew up in Chicago.  Idolizing the heroes of all the S&SF stories he read, Brett enrolled at UC Berkeley with the intent of becoming a rocket scientist.  Sadly, this dream was never achieved as there were some issues concerning attendance, study habits, and the opening of textbooks.  Needless to say, it became apparent to everyone after a few weeks (and to Brett himself only a month or two later) that he wasn’t ready for a college education, so he hit the open road and traveled across the Western United States in almost every conceivable fashion: hitchhiking, [redacted], and yes, even driving a car.  Several years later, his wanderlust satiated, Brett decided to settle down, and purchase a slice of Heaven located in the Ozark Mountains.  As is so often the case, this particular slice of Heaven not only housed the original Temple of the Frog King and Palace of the Monkey God, but by some malicious coincidence, it also happened to be the ancestral birthplace of poison ivy.  Oddly, Brett found that he was allergic to the vile weed, so itching and scratching, he decided to rejoin society and accepted a near-corporate job selling widgets, whatchamacallits, and thingamadingies.  Not knowing the names of the things he sold or even what they were for obviously cut into his sales commissions, but Brett was happy, content, and after 20 years (that flew by as if in a bad dream... or second rate novel), he met [redacted], who insisted he move to Hawaii [because of reasons].  Well, what was the good Brett to do?  After mulling his choices over for a solid 30-seconds, Brett choose Hawaii.  And it was in Hawaii, my friends, by the beach, watching the Mermaids at play, that he finally decided to pick up the quill and start editing The Dragon Bound Quartet... because you got to do something when the ocean is flat and the waves aren’t cooking.

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#Short Version of Bio

Brett Paufler (the copyright© holder to the Dragon Bound series) has hitchhiked around the West, [redacted], built a log cabin with his bare teeth, and worked a dead-end near-corporate job for 20-odd years before throwing it all away in order to follow his muse and move to Hawaii.  Not exactly a storybook life, but then, we can’t all be Celli, can we?