House Hunting 2021-10-16 (c) Copyright Brett Paufler # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # I have been lackadaisically (very lackadaisically) looking for a permanent home (please, call it a house) with My Darling for over a year now. Why the delay? Well, let's see: 1: I thought I was entering a Buyer's Market. But it's actually a Seller's Market. 2: I want more house than I can afford, which is typically the case. But it's taken some time to figure out which corners to cut. 3: The current living situation is pretty sweet. Sure, in many ways, it is just adequate. But it's got a few nice perks, including cheapness of rent (which includes unlimited hot water, scorching free heat in the winter, and electricity for all the grow lights I wish to burn, which is currently zero, but, you know, possibilities... and total lack of concern); and then, I just like it. So, I'm not in a hurry, especially since I know we will get there eventually. Any-the-how, on the way, I've put together a few note files, many of which are complete garbage and none of which I am referencing anymore. So, time to cull. # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #File Name# Optional Date Line {Introductory Header} Document Text # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # And I guess, additional notes along the way will be included in sections such as this, which have no #Header#. The idea which induced the need for an additional {comment only} entry concerns a desire to list the files in some sort of meaningful order (say, by time stamp), which itself is confounded by the difficulty in doing such a thing, as all the phone note time stamps have been reset to a few days ago when I pulled them from my phone. The same {ordering concern} could just as easily be applied to quality. Do I start with the wheat or the chaff? And if it really is wheat, why am I not preserving it as an independent file to highlight its quality, as I have done for so many lesser items, thus far? Well, that last is easy. A mash-up such as this provides Security Through Obscurity, as the typical human will not bother to read this far. Besides, all the real info (PII & $$$) has been scrubbed, leaving behind the rather obvious (at this point) data point that I have been (and still am) house hunting and it is not going as fast as one might expect. Whatever. Let's start with some garbage files to further discourage the idle flesh bags in the audience. # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #HOUSE PRO-CON# {From phone. I haven't touched any of the phone files in months. And deleting them was the motivating factor for this project: i.e. the answer to Why Now?} PRO Permanence Space/Locations Projects Laundry CON Cost Upkeep (1hr/day) Distance to ----- {Thus --redactions-- abound... well, no such much abound, as are there.} # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # As always: [Amended Redaction] ---- = inline redaction {Comments added during the editing process.} # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # The truth is that once I get going, I like the sound of my own typing. Also, it's not just The Raw Data. This commentary is a major part of The Value Added... you know, if there is, indeed, any Value Added. # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #LOAN# {This is/was a pretty good file. It's a list of questions I put together to ask a loan officer, whose answers (not included) it turns out were not always that accurate. I was only a moderately good Office Worker / Paper Pusher. During the process, it has felt like dealing with myself time-and-time again.} LOAN (print) {During the Question & Answer, I worked off a printed copy of this file.} Issues Non-Married Couple? Formula (for pre-approved amount)? Weight of different asset classes? Asset/360 = Monthly Income? [[Cash x 1.00 + Stock x 0.70 + IRA x 0.50]]? Income x 0.45? Just Mortgage? Property Tax? Dividend, Interest, Capital Gains? Down Payment? Interest Rate? Same as per Income Based Loan? Pre-approval Cost? Time for Approval? Credit Hit For Pre-approval? Term of Pre-Approval? Auto-Renew or From Scratch? Conflicts Multiple Pre-Approvals? ----- Hard Minimum? -----? Can spend down? Transfer Out? Statement: Full or Total Line? Print, Email, or Online? Loan Cost? Points? Other Products? Rental Loans? Half Rental? Benefits of using ----? {There is still so much to read between the lines, there. These were my questions. Thus, these were my concerns. Oh, I, also, compiled this on my phone.} # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #House Wants# renamed to #Banks# {The Banking Information (List of Lenders talked to and preliminary response, upshot, and/or response) has been [Redacted in Full], sight unseen. This is, also, from my phone (the last file of that type). And was originally envisioned as a running list of Housing Wants: Those aspects which are important or not, Deal Breakers versus Deal Makers. But the variable nature and nuances of the problem made compiling such a list... difficult, as such things shall forever be in temporal flux.} Rural or Suburban? This will need to be answered. Screened or Enclosed Porch Hardscaped Sitting Areas Tall Liveable Basement {I could try and list out what's important. But in the end, I think we are (or at least, I am) looking for something extreme: an outlier in one dimension or another, which makes the house uniquely desirable. Essentially, I want to love the house, so I need to fall in love with it. And for that to happen, I think I need individuality. I talk a lot (to the exasperation of others) about Ghosts, Stories, and Dreams. I lament the loss (to some extent; but then, not overly) of Hill House, Graveyard, Church, Temple, and Double Barn. So, like, if I can't name it, it's not even in the running. It's odd how the house we were closest to buying (6-1/2 Acres) is not even on the list, as for me, that house's most impressive features were external (killer driveway, extensive forest, huge yard). As with everyone else, winning the lottery would solve a lot of problems.} # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # From here, I think I will list the remaining files in time stamp order (those touched last, first), making note of said time stamp, as a bit of an informational add-on. # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # But first... Hill House: An Awesome Victorian In Insanely Bad Shape Graveyard: Oh, yeah. Right there. Church: Talk About Vaulted Ceilings Temple: Turn Key Ready For All Your Cultish Needs Double Barn: Ironically, I never set foot inside of Double Barn, Graveyard, or Church. The Market is that hot. And here I was thinking The Vid would depress the housing market. # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #Three Contracts# 2020-09-28 {This turned out to be a simple (never used) reminder file for the development of (possible) alternative ownership rights, which by quirk of Legal Stupidity (which in itself is rampant beyond belief) are illegal (i.e. unenforceable and/or unenforceable enough as to be eminently defeatable) in the current locale... or at least, that's what my two minutes of research revealed (for this non-lawyer, non-legally trained mind), based upon my personal assumption/intention as to what these three things are actually about (i.e. there are whole pages of assumed conditions left unrecorded: i.e./i.e. all three are Personal Terms of Art [DISCLAIMER: as really, are all Terms of Art that I use]).} {And really, now much can anyone trust a sentence whose nesting structure ends with "]).}"?} {Much less, a sentence fragment (such as this), which ends with '"]).}"?}'?} {ad infinitum} 1: Inheritance 2: Unequal Investment 3: Forced Sale # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #HOUSE# 2020-10-06 {Scratch Pad Calculations (of Back of Napkin Quality), which should be relied upon for no purpose (even if they were my starting numbers), provided in .csv format.} ,,,,[LOCALE],"$400,000.00","$350,000.00","$300,000.00","$250,000.00" ,,,,,,,, ,,,,29100.00000,,,, ,,TOTAL/MONTH,,"$2,425.00","$3,863.00","$3,442.00","$3,021.00","$2,600.00" Mortage,,0.00550,,"$1,100.00","$2,200.00","$1,925.00","$1,650.00","$1,375.00" Property Tax,,0.00250,,$625.00,"$1,000.00",$875.00,$750.00,$625.00 Insurance,,0.00042,,$200.00,$168.00,$147.00,$126.00,$105.00 UTILITIES,,,,$500.00,$495.00,$495.00,$495.00,$495.00 MAINTE/REPAIR,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,, Electricity/Gas,,300.00000,,,,,, Garbage,,20.00000,,,,,, Water/Sewage,,100.00000,,,,,, Internet,,75.00000,,,,,, TOTAL UTILITIES,,495.00000,,,,,, ,,,,,,,, Structural Repair,,,,,,,, Maintenance (leaks),,,,,,,, Design Allowance,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,, ,,,,66.66667,200000 in months,,, {There is no basis other than my own guesswork for these numbers.} # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #Housing Must Haves# 2020-12-10 {The starting idea was to form a sort of checklist. But in the end, I think it reduces to As Much As Possible with Quirkiness as a Definite (and Required) Plus. Still, there is a limit to my handyman abilities. And I have no desire to buy any property which requires outside help from the get go.} Sunny Water & Mold Free Basement Structurally Sound [Wouldn't You Like To Know] Fireplace? # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #Banks# 2021-08-21 {There was a file. Deal... or in this case, No Deal.} [REDACTED IN FULL] [Financial Institution] [Upshot: No or Go] # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # The final file is a Standard Real Estate Contract for The Local Market, which for obvious (copyright) reasons, I will not be including. Reasons for the sparseness of notes include: Personal/Financial Nature of Endeavour Slowness of Progress Extreme Indeterminate Nature of The Solution & Problem Set Basically, there is a limit to my openness. #EOF - End of File